Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Pedophile Passes Up Petitioned Pizza

Today, the state of Ohio executed one of the worst of the worst, the lowest of the low, the filthiest of the filthy, when they served a lethal cocktail to convicted killer Ronald Phillips. Phillips earned his death sentence for the rape and murder of his girlfriend's three-year-old daughter in 1993.

For his last meal, Phillips ordered a pizza with mushrooms and peppers, a bottle of Pepsi, and strawberry cheesecake, along with grape juice and unleavened bread for a solo version of communion. Phillips reportedly sent back the pizza, however, and also turned down the "real last meal" breakfast he would have received before his mid-morning execution.  

Thursday, July 6, 2017

Finding Nemo's Last Meal

Despite a flurry of protests, convicted killer William Morva was executed by the state of Virginia tonight. Morva earned his death sentence for killing a hospital security guard and a deputy after he escaped from jail while serving time for attempted robbery.

Most of the protests surrounding Morva’s execution were related to his questionable mental health. While incarcerated, Morva was diagnosed as having a personality disorder that manifested in “odd beliefs.” In Morva’s case, that meant going barefoot most of the time, eating pinecones and large quantities of raw meat, and professing that President George W. Bush was plotting his murder. Morva also renounced his legal name at one point, calling it a “slave name,” and went by the name of Nemo instead—although there are few similarities between Morva and the beloved cartoon fish.

As readers of our book already know, Virginia’s last meal tradition is one of the most disappointing in the nation. Inmates may only choose from food available in the prisoner kitchen at the time, and they may also choose to keep their last meal hidden from the press. We’re still trying to find “Nemo’s” last meal, so check back soon for updates! 

Separated at birth, or no similarity whatsoever? You make the call!

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

No Meal or Monologue for Melson

A big thank-you to sharp-eyed fans of the blog who pointed out our omission of the execution of Robert Melson, which took place in Alabama last week. Due to a flurry of last-minute stays and appeals, this one came in under our radar.

Melson received his death sentence for his part in a triple murder that took place in 1994. Melson and an accomplice robbed a Popeye's fast food restaurant and shot four of its employees, killing three of them. The two men netted just over $2,000 in the robbery.

Melson's execution was relatively uneventful, and from the perspective of a blog that chronicles last meals and last words, it was also lacking in interesting trivia. One can always hope that an inmate's last meal or final statement will be evocative, or unusual, or somehow related to the killer's past history or the crime itself. For instance, John Wayne Gacy ordered Kentucky Fried Chicken as part of his last meal, which was ironic because the famous serial killer who dressed like a clown was also a former KFC employee. In that same vein, Melson could have ordered Popeye's chicken for his last meal. He also might have requested a heaping helping of spinach for his final dinner, than announced "I yam what I yam and that's all that I am," as he lay strapped to the execution table. Unfortunately, though, ironies such as these apparently weren't on Melson's mind during his final hours, as he requested no last meal and spoke no final words.  

Friday, May 26, 2017

Eighth Time is a Charm for Thomas Arthur

Alabama's Thomas Arthur probably thought he would never be executed. After all, the two-time convicted killer had been on death row for 34 years and had faced execution seven previous times. But in each of those cases, Arthur danced away from the Grim Reaper's grasp at the very last second by winning various appeals.

The Grim Reaper finally caught up with Arthur last night, however, when the man was finally put to death on the eighth try. 

Despite the fanfare involving his execution, Arthur did not order or eat a last meal. "I don't believe in that last meal baloney," he told a reporter. "I never have the appetite. When they're trying to kill you, you're not hungry."

Coincidentally, Last Meal Baloney was the name of a product put out by Oscar Mayer in the 1990s as part of its ill-fated Criminal Cold Cuts line of deli meats. 

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Georgia Takes Out the Trash

Convicted killer J.W. Ledford was executed by the state of Georgia last night, and we just have to say it: the J.W. might as well stand for “Just Weird,” because that’s what this guy’s case was.

Ledford was sentenced to death for the murder of his neighbor, Dr. Harry Johnston, who was also the same doctor who delivered Ledford when he was born. On the day of the killing, Ledford asked Johnston for a ride to the grocery store. Johnston agreed, but then changed his mind because he thought Ledford had stolen something from him. Back at Johnston’s house, Ledford apparently took a knife from Johnston and killed the doctor with it, nearly severing the man’s head in the process (according to Ledford’s confession, he “cut the shit out of him.”) Ledford then invaded the house, tied up Johnston’s wife, and stole some guns and money, claiming he needed it to buy drugs.

Ledford, who went by the nickname “Boy” for some odd reason, tried to force the state of Georgia to execute him by firing squad instead of lethal injection, but failed.

Ledford ended his final statement with the words, “You can kiss my white trash ass.”

For his last meal, Ledford asked for a gut-busting dinner of filet mignon wrapped in bacon with pepper Jack cheese, a large order of French fries, 10 chicken tenders with sauce, a fried pork chop, a bloomin’ onion, pecan pie with vanilla ice cream, sherbet, and Sprite.

Friday, April 28, 2017

Arkansas 4, Killers 0

Arkansas wrapped up its month of "speed executions" with number 4 last night when Kenneth Williams shook hands with the Grim Reaper. Williams had been imprisoned for murder when he escaped in 1999 and consequently caused the deaths of three other people.

Williams asked to receive Communion before his last meal, which included two pieces of fried chicken, barbecue beans, sweet rice, whole kernel corn, stewed seasoned tomatoes, two cinnamon rolls, two cookies, four slices of bread and fruit punch.